What is financial infidelity in a marriage?

Asked by: Prof. Jayson Erdman II  |  Last update: February 9, 2022
Score: 4.2/5 (43 votes)

Financial infidelity happens when you or your spouse intentionally lie about money. When you deliberately choose not to tell the truth about your spending habits (no matter how big or small), that is financial infidelity.

What is considered financial infidelity?

Financial infidelity is when couples with combined finances lie to each other about money. Examples of financial infidelity can include hiding existing debts, excessive expenditures without notifying the other partner, and lying about the use of money.

Can a marriage survive financial infidelity?

Recovering from financial infidelity takes a lot of work from both partners. However, if you're truly committed to each other, it is possible to get through it. Here's what experts recommend to help couples rebuild trust and perhaps even come out stronger than before.

Is financial infidelity a reason to divorce?

Infidelity is a very common cause of divorce. ... But the divorces in Orange County, California are not always caused by that kind of disloyalty. Studies show that financial infidelity, the act of spending money without the knowledge of the other spouse, is a common and rising cause of many marital problems and divorce.

How serious is financial infidelity?

Just like sexual infidelity, financial infidelity is a very serious breach of trust. If you are afraid to discuss any financial issue with your spouse, then what you are dealing with is larger than a financial problem, it is a relationship problem.

Game Changing Marriage and Money Insights - Jeff and Shaunti Feldhahn

22 related questions found

Is financial infidelity abuse?

Is financial infidelity abuse? In short, yes — financial infidelity can be a form of abuse. Financial infidelity is any money-related behavior where one person in the relationship is less than honest with the other person.

How do you prove financial infidelity?

Here are six telltale signs of financial infidelity:
  1. Hiding a purchase intentionally. ...
  2. Getting cashback without telling your spouse. ...
  3. Having a secret savings account. ...
  4. Stashing bills. ...
  5. Opening secret credit cards or new accounts. ...
  6. Playing the dollar-for-dollar game. ...
  7. Communicate. ...
  8. Get on the same page.

Can you sue your spouse for financial infidelity?

If your spouse secretly opened an account and incurred debt while conducting an affair or compulsively shopping for their own ends, you may be able to make a claim to the courts that your lack of awareness of the debt and the fact that it only benefited your spouse means that the debt isn't marital property subject to ...

How can I save my marriage after financial infidelity?

How to Fix a Marriage After Financial Infidelity
  1. 1 Talk about the reasons why financial infidelity happened.
  2. 2 Address your money goals.
  3. 3 Keep track of each other's credit cards and accounts.
  4. 4 Check-in with your spouse before big purchases.
  5. 5 Make a budget together.
  6. 6 Create a roadmap to get out of debt.

Is your spouse hiding money from your 6 things to watch?

Here are six warning signs that your spouse may be hiding marital assets and/or income:
  • #1: Overpaying Debts. ...
  • #2: Taking Control of the Finances. ...
  • #3: Making Expensive Purchases Without Your Knowledge. ...
  • #4: Opening a Private Post Office Box. ...
  • #5: Making Unknown Payments Out of Joint Accounts. ...
  • #6: Paying Unknown Debts.

How common is financial infidelity?

Of the 2,501 U.S. adults surveyed, 44% have been financially unfaithful. 0f those, 34% said they had overspent and kept their spending a secret from their partner. 12% revealed they kept their debts a secret from their partner while 17% had private accounts.

What are the 3 grounds for divorce?

Following are the 9 common legal grounds for divorce which are widely present in all current enactments on divorce law:
  • Adultery.
  • Desertion.
  • Insanity.
  • Conversion.
  • Renunciation.
  • Cruelty.
  • Venereal disease.
  • Presumption of death.

How do I deal with a financially irresponsible husband?

5 Ways to Deal with a Financially Irresponsible Spouse
  1. Get to Know Their Finances Before You Marry.
  2. Have a Heart to Heart with Your Financially Irresponsible Spouse.
  3. Take Over Paying the Bills.
  4. Seek Financial Help.
  5. Protect Yourself.
  6. Bottom Line: Dealing with a Financially Irresponsible Spouse.

How do you divide financial responsibility in a marriage?

Here's how it goes:
  1. Keep your individual bank accounts, but also open a joint checking account together. ...
  2. Add your individual incomes together to get your total household income. ...
  3. Add up all the expenses you've agreed to split. ...
  4. Every month, both partners transfer their share into the joint account.

Why do people lie about finances?

Kendrick says the chief reasons people lie about money to their partners are pragmatism, control, guilt, and fear. The pragmatic lie may result from planning an eventual split and not wanting the other to know how much money is available.

How do I confess my spouse's debt?

Here's how to tell your spouse before it's too late.
  1. Stop. You might be riddled with guilt and dying to unload all the truth, but please wait. ...
  2. Find the Root Problem. Make Your Money Work for You. ...
  3. Accept Responsibility. ...
  4. Empathize. ...
  5. Promise To Never Do It Again.

Is a husband responsible for his wife's credit card debt?

You are generally not responsible for your spouse's credit card debt unless you are a co-signor for the card or it is a joint account. However, state laws vary and divorce or the death of your spouse could also impact your liability for this debt.

How do you protect yourself from financially irresponsible spouse?

5 Steps To Protect Yourself BEFORE The Divorce
  1. Close Joint Credit Cards. If you have a joint card with someone and you don't want to be responsible for their continued spending, contact the credit card company NOW. ...
  2. Investment and Bank Accounts. ...
  3. Protect Your Data. ...
  4. Protect Your Mail. ...
  5. Get A Credit Report.

Can I sue my husband for not giving me money?

If an abusive partner (to whom you are not married) failed to re-pay money that you lent to him/her or failed to make credit card or loan payments that s/he agreed to, you may be able to take the abuser to small claims court to sue for that money.

Can I sue my husband for emotional distress?

Emotional Abuse Can Give You the Right to Sue

If your spouse has intentionally caused you to suffer emotional distress, you may have the right to file a civil lawsuit for damages. Filing a lawsuit can hold your spouse accountable for their actions and allow you to recover comepnsation.

What is financial enmeshment?

Financial enmeshment occurs when parents involve their children in adult financial matters before the children are cognitively and emotionally ready to cope with the information. Financial enmeshment may have a negative effect on the child's development. Financial enmeshment can be addressed through financial therapy.

How do you protect yourself financially in a marriage?

How to Financially Protect Yourself in a Divorce
  1. Legally establish the separation/divorce.
  2. Get a copy of your credit report and monitor activity.
  3. Separate debt to financially protect your assets.
  4. Move half of joint bank balances to a separate account.
  5. Comb through your assets.
  6. Conduct a cash flow analysis.

Who should hold the main financial responsibility in a marriage?

In households where one spouse shoulders all of the financial responsibility, that spouse is typically the husband. It is also common for wives to handle bill paying and shopping while husbands manage the big picture planning, such as retirement accounts, insurance and tax planning.

How can financial problems affect a marriage?

Losing your job, bringing a significant amount of debt into the marriage, or having poor credit can severely limit the financial options you have as a married couple. A lack of income can prevent you from buying a house, buying a car, traveling, saving for retirement, and even starting a family.

Can I sleep with my wife during divorce?

Getting a divorce but still sleeping together is likely to result in your petition being denied and dismissed if you filed on the basis of irreconcilable differences; If you filed on the basis of fault grounds, such as adultery, desertion, or habitual drunkenness; sex during divorce could be seen as condonation.