Undermining behaviour intended to destroy an employee's confidence. For example, open criticism or alleging that others have complained where, in fact, there is no evidence of any complaint.
Gaslighting often happens when employees raise legitimate issues — like discrimination, wage violations, or harassment — and management or HR tries to make them doubt their experiences instead of addressing the problem.
Signs Your Boss Might Be Gaslighting You
Recognizing these behaviors is the first step in protecting yourself. One of the most telling signs is persistent denial. If your boss consistently denies conversations, agreements, or events that you distinctly remember, they might be trying to make you question your memory.
If someone uses any of these nine phrases, they may be gaslighting you:
Some common gaslighting tactics include: Undermining an employee's abilities or achievements by constantly and unfairly criticizing their work or belittling their contributions. Denying an employee's experiences or emotions, making them question their own perceptions.
Under certain conditions, victims can take legal action and hold employers accountable for gaslighting so long as the behavior constitutes a legally enforceable type of workplace misconduct.
Overly busy or stressed appearance. Negative body language. Lack of empathy. Lack of constructive criticism. Unpredictable reactions.
Experts categorize gaslighting into five types: outright lying, coercion, scapegoating, reality questioning, and trivializing. Each type serves to manipulate the victim's perception and undermine their confidence, making it vital for individuals to recognize these patterns in their relationships.
Here are some behaviors that are invalidating and cause harm; however, they may not be gaslighting, such as:
Here are five shifts to alter the dynamic between you and your gaslighter:
They Take Credit for Others' Work
This kind of behavior is a glaring red flag of a toxic boss. When someone does this, they aren't just using your hard work to boost their own career—they are also erasing your contributions and hurting your ability to grow professionally.
What to Look For If You Are Being Set Up For Termination
The most likely target of workplace bullying is the kind of worker many employers dream of: workers who are highly self-sufficient, judicious, and creative, and who demonstrate internal motivation, possess a benevolent worldview, and refrain from office politics and one-upmanship.
The decision to terminate an employee mostly always comes from their manager or supervisor. HR's role is majorly to coordinate the process, explain your rights and benefits when leaving an organization, and make sure your employer follows the law and the company policies.
Spotting the signs of Gaslighting is easier than you might think. Signs (not exclusively) include; A lack of openness and transparency. This may be with immediate line management in a one-on-one relationship or it may be at Corporate level involving an entire Executive Board and/or a business owner.
Document Everything When dealing with a toxic person, especially in HR, it's critical to document every interaction, email, or conversation. Make detailed notes on any instances of inappropriate behaviour or misconduct. Having concrete evidence will help protect you if the issue escalates.
Trivialize – Minimize and dismiss their feelings or tell them that they are overreacting to a situation. Lie – Lie about or deny something and refuse to admit the lie even when proof is shown. Distort reality – Be adamant that they did or said something even when they did not.
Ghosting is similar to benching. However, while benching keeps various partners on standby, ghosting completely cuts off the connection with no intent of speaking again.
The following examples illustrate the most commonly documented gaslighting tactics used to manipulate and control victims.
While a person may occasionally mislead or lie to others, a true gaslighter often lies or misleads. They almost always have a personality disorder such as Narcissistic Personality Disorder (commonly known as a narcissist) or Anti-social Personality Disorder (commonly known as a psychopath or sociopath).
Other techniques gaslighters might use include lying by hiding or changing information, projecting their own negative actions, faults, and/or shortcomings onto the victim, accusing the victim of being mentally ill or crazy, constantly bringing attention to and belittling a victim for their weaknesses, and sidetracking ...
Certain words that scare human resources signal legal risk, cultural mismatch, lack of preparation, or poor professionalism. Recruiters and HR professionals monitor language for red flags—terms like “lawsuit,” “toxic,” or absolutes such as “never” can prompt deeper scrutiny or immediate concern.
25 Common red flags of an unhealthy work environment
What to do when your boss or manager is bullying you? When a boss or manager is bullying you, it's important to document the behavior, report it to HR or a higher authority, seek support from colleagues, and consider consulting with a lawyer if necessary.